Friday, March 27, 2009

I Just Cut a Big One

I get up at 6:15 every morning. Rather, that is when my alarm goes off. I crawl out from under the covers about 10 minutes after that. Shower, put make up on, brush my hair and begin the search for something to wear. Now, if I were smart, and I used to be, I would pick out my clothes the night before. I do attempt to do this but I fail miserably. Most nights I end up falling asleep on the couch and end up pissed off that I have to get up and brush my teeth and trudge upstairs to bed, the travesty of it all!! Needless to say, I do not feel quite like stopping at the heap of shit I call clothes and digging through in hopes of finding an outfit for the next day. Yes, my clean clothes are piled on the floor, and in Hayden's room, and in the laundry room, WHAT?, I work 45 hours a week and care for a 13 month old when I get home. A mama has to watch TV sometime. Clothes, um, not at the top of my list. Putting them away isn't anyway.

I usually can locate a pair of pants rather quickly. The space on the back of the love seat in Hayden's room or the dryer are prime holding areas for clean clothes, I check these areas first. Things get a little complicated from this point on. Surprisingly, panties are not hard to find. Socks and a bra are though, and so is a shirt. Occasionally, if I am in dire need, I will creep back upstairs and by cell phone light look for a piece of cloth to cover the upper portion of my body for the day. This part sucks as it isn't nearly enough light (damn you, cell phone) and I end up slamming a button or a belt buckle on the (laminate) floor and OH! good morning guys, sorry to wake y'all up. And I truly am because this is what makes me late for work. If Hayden wakes up before I leave I will without a doubt be late, by 5 minutes, never fails. So, my goal in the morning is to go unnoticed and, if possible, find something to put on that does not require me to go upstairs.

Which brings me to my goal for today...make it through work without anyone really noticing the shirt I scrounged for and used to cover the upper portion of my body. I actually found this beauty sitting on the back of the love seat in Hayden's room. Hayden was sound to sleep upstairs with her daddy, so lighting up her room at the butt crack of dawn had no effect on her whatsoever. Take a peek, and yes, I did achieve my goal. Not one person noticed my shirt and if they did they did not say a word. Gotta love working in a warehouse where looking professional only happens when the Germans are in town.

ACK! Ignore the puffy morning eyes!

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